It’s been a long year, eh?

I have now had the Vagal Nerve Device for 40 days. There have been two adjustments since last we spoke, one being just Monday. I am now at 0.75 milliamps every 5 minutes with the magnet therapy at 25% higher (so, 1.0 mA). My neurologist says that the goal is about 1.5 – 2 mA, so I am about halfway to my therapeutic dosage. Over the next three months or so we will continue titrating upwards as planned. Once I am at my goal amperage, we’ll see how I react to it for a couple of months and then see if we can began tinkering with some of my medication.

As far as how I am currently reacting to it – my coworker at the women’s shelter giggles whenever she notices my voice get a little froggy. Every once in a while I sound like a 5 pack a day smoker for 40 years with big poofed up blue hair sitting at the end of a gloomy bar in my gold halter dress with nine gold rings, bronze tan and saggy breasts. I think my name would be Doris. “Hey Charlie, wanna give me a light?”

So basically, that’s my 2014 epilepsy plan.

I haven’t made any glorious plans as far as cycling goes as of yet. When I make plans, I end up spending a bunch of money on team kit, bike builds, team dues. . . and then end up with some sort of medical issues. Sigh. Not this year, fate! I’m going to just see what comes to me in the spring.

I am focused on my new touring bike build. The fork, front rack and stem just went off to powder coating. (I honestly wouldn’t have gotten all matchy-matchy with the rack and stem but the fork was going in anyway, so. . . why the hell not, right?! That’s what I fucking said too! I’m glad we think the same!) I don’t have the budget to be throwing down for a new build all at once by any means, so this bike is a huge fantastic project for me. I have been working it out on a spreadsheet for months.

The nice part about pacing it out is that I get to really think about what components I want to use and ensure that everything is going to work smoothly together before I commit to the purchase. The horrible part about pacing out the purchasing is I have a chance to change my mind thirty times. I am on Spreadsheet Configuration 4.0 at this point. I have promised that I am, at this point, locking in components “for realsies” because I am actually laying money down now.

What about New Years Resolutions, Halley? Last year you had a NYR!

So yeah. On Monday, December 30th I was laying in bed with my boyfriend – mind you he works normal work hours and is sweet enough to stay up late for me so when his head hits the pillow, he immediately begins to fall asleep. Actually, he’s usually asleep on the couch before we even get up to the bedroom. Anyway, we are in bed, and I whisper: “Brad, what about our New years Eve-Eve tradition?” Groggily, barely awake: “What tradition?” “Well, by the time I get home from work tomorrow it will already be 2014, so this will be the last time we are in bed together in 2013 so we should tell each our hopes, dreams, aspirations for 2014. So we can dream them together into 2014.” He’s quiet for a moment. I think he fell asleep. “That’s our tradition?” “Well, it is now. I’ll remember it next year. (Possible lie.) You’ve got to think of something.” And the amazing thing is that after a little reluctance he actually gave me feedback.

The most difficult thing for me working two jobs is that we really only have one day off together and often only get to see each other for at most an hour in the morning and at night. Generally one or both of us are very exhausted at either time and so conversation isn’t the most connected. So these moments are amazing.

As for resolutions. If I stick to plans or if I don’t, it doesn’t really matter – because you know that I won’t.

Just as long as I ride more bikes.

PS. Not to be too cheesy, but I put this up at my work last night because it was topical and I kind of like it. It’s one of those little book of over-used quotes and probably out of context. Especially due to the fact that the person in question I don’t actually know exactly how they were able to transliterate her script. But whatever. That doesn’t make it any less good.

“Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties.” – Helen Keller